How To Help Your Child Manage Big Emotions: Breathe

Emotions can often swell to overwhelming proportions in a world filled with ever-increasing demands, stressors, and challenges. These emotions can be difficult to manage, whether it’s anxiety, anger, sadness, or even moments of intense joy. Fortunately, there is a remarkable tool available to everyone that will show you how to help your child manage big emotions, a tool that is always within reach and entirely free: the breath. This article explores the profound impact of conscious breathing in managing big emotions and offers practical insights on making the most of this powerful tool in our daily lives.

The Connection Between Breath and Emotions

Our breath is not just a physiological necessity; it’s deeply intertwined with our emotional and psychological well-being. The relationship between breath and emotions is a profound one. When we experience intense emotions, our breath often reflects that intensity. Fear may lead to shallow, rapid breathing, while anger can manifest as short and heavy breaths. Conversely, moments of joy and contentment are accompanied by calm, deep breaths.

The breath-emotion connection works both ways. We can influence and regulate our emotional states by intentionally altering our breath. This principle is deeply rooted in ancient practices such as yoga, meditation, and mindfulness. In recent years, modern psychology and neuroscience have also recognized the potential of breathwork as a tool for managing emotions and promoting mental well-being.

Understanding how conscious breathing can affect our emotional state can empower us to harness its potential for managing big emotions effectively.

Breath and Stress Reduction

One of the most common and overwhelming emotions people experience is stress. Stress can result from various sources, including work pressure, personal relationships, financial concerns, or health issues. When stressed, our body’s fight-or-flight response kicks in, leading to increased heart rate and shallow, rapid breathing. This response is a survival mechanism, preparing us to confront or flee from a threat. However, chronic stress can be detrimental to our physical and mental health in modern life.

Conscious breathing, particularly deep diaphragmatic breathing, can counteract the stress response. When we engage in slow, deep breaths, we signal to our body that there is no imminent threat and it’s safe to relax. This, in turn, activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes relaxation and reduces stress. Breathing exercises like the 4-7-8 technique, inhaling for four counts, holding for seven, and exhaling for eight, can help calm the mind and manage stress effectively.

Breath and Anger Management

Anger is another intense emotion that can be challenging to navigate. It often arises when we feel threatened, disrespected, or frustrated. When angry, our breath becomes short and fast, mirroring the heightened state of arousal. Attempting to communicate or make decisions in this state can lead to impulsive reactions and regret.

Taking deep, intentional breaths during moments of anger allows you to create a pause before reacting. This pause provides an opportunity to assess the situation more rationally and respond in a more constructive and less damaging way. Consciously regulating your breath in the face of anger can help you regain control of your emotions and prevent them from escalating.

Breath and Anxiety Relief

Anxiety, often characterized by racing thoughts and a sense of impending doom, can be an emotionally crippling experience. Anxious individuals often suffer from shallow, rapid breathing, contributing to an unease and panic cycle. Conscious, controlled breathwork, such as the 4-7-8 technique mentioned earlier or simple belly breathing, can be instrumental in breaking this cycle.

We ground ourselves in the present moment when we focus on our breath and make it slow and deliberate. This mindfulness practice can help us step out of the whirlwind of anxious thoughts and regain a sense of control. Over time, incorporating breathwork into daily routines can reduce the frequency and intensity of anxiety attacks and help individuals manage their anxiety more effectively.

Breath and Sadness or Grief

Emotions like sadness and grief can feel all-encompassing and paralyzing. When overwhelmed by such feelings, we may not realize that our breath has become shallow and constricted. Deep, intentional breathwork can help us navigate these emotions with more grace and resilience.

Practicing slow, deep breaths provides oxygen to our brain and body, enhancing our mental clarity and emotional resilience. Taking deep breaths and allowing oneself to experience sadness can be therapeutic when dealing with grief. The breath carries us through the wave of emotion, helping us emerge on the other side with a greater sense of acceptance and healing.

Practical Tips for Using Breath to Manage Emotions

Daily Breathwork Practice: Commit to integrating breathwork into your daily routine. This can be as simple as dedicating a few minutes in the morning or evening to practice deep breathing exercises.
Mindful Breathing: Pay attention to your breath throughout the day. Notice when your breath becomes shallow or irregular and use that as a cue to engage in mindful, deep breathing.

Breath Awareness in Emotional Moments: When amid intense emotions, take a moment to step back and focus on your breath. Breathe consciously, and you’ll be better equipped to handle the situation.

Seek Guidance: Consider seeking guidance from a qualified practitioner in breathwork, yoga, or meditation. They can provide personalized techniques and practices that suit your specific needs.

Combine with Other Techniques: Breathwork can be even more effective when combined with other strategies for emotional management, such as journaling, therapy, or physical exercise.

Our breath is a powerful tool for managing big emotions. It connects our physical and emotional states and gives us influence and control. By harnessing the potential of conscious breathing, we can reduce stress, manage anger, relieve anxiety, and navigate sadness and grief with greater ease.

Incorporating breathwork into your daily life is a simple yet profound step towards improving your emotional well-being. It’s a tool that is always available, entirely free, and can be practiced anywhere, anytime. Whether you’re facing the challenges of a stressful workday or personal setbacks, your breath is your steadfast companion in managing big emotions and nurturing mental well-being. So, take a deep breath and let the journey towards emotional resilience and balance begin.

Kimberley Arnett-DeSimone, a career pediatric occupational therapist in Huntersville, North Carolina, authored this post.